Two Types of Divorce

By Jesse McComb

Will you be getting divorced?

Whether your divorce is contested or uncontested can dictate how long your divorce process takes and how much it costs in legal fees. Before I go on, its important to talk to a family lawyer if you have a family law matter.

Every divorce proceeds differently. Some proceed with little or no dispute between the parties. Some proceed with many issues in dispute that can end up being resolved in a trial.

An uncontested divorce is when all terms are agree upon. This is advantageous because the number of steps involved are fewer than a contested divorce.

If you and your spouse do not agree on all the terms, then you have a contested divorce on your hands. Just because you dont agree doesnt mean you should compromise in order to have an uncontested divorce.

Should I care whether my divorce situation is contested or uncontested?

Yes, it does matter because there is a huge difference in how your divorce will proceed.

With an uncontested divorce, you and your partner need only file the paperwork with the applicable Court to obtain a divorce. Often theres a waiting period; however, you simply wait rather than take many legal steps during that waiting period.

If you and your partner do NOT agree on all the terms, then youll have to pursue negotiations, mediation, or trial.

The key disadvantage to a contested divorce is the legal costs. Legal fees add up quickly; however, they may be incurred wisely to protect your rights and obligations.

From contested to uncontested

Many contested divorce situations change to uncontested through negotiation and/or mediation and dont go to trial. This usually involves lawyers who are able to resolve the matter. Sometimes the legal advice helps parties change their position to result in an uncontested divorce process.

The good news is that hiring a lawyer can help your contested divorce situation because negotiations continue. Also, you can attend a mediation which can help you and your spouse resolve the contested issues.

How important is it to hire a divorce attorney?

Its a good idea to at the very least consult a lawyer to review the terms to which youve agreed. Many divorce lawyers will meet with you for a consultation to review any agreement youve entered into. Such review can be helpful and provide you peace of mind about the terms to which youve agreed. It helps to get professional legal advice before signing anything pertaining to your divorce ... even if its only for a consultation.

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Next, learn about a BC uncontested divorce and how to hire a BC family lawyer for your BC divorce.

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Two Things That Terrify All Men

He will never tell you any of this.

In fact, he’s dying to read this article, but he would never let you catch him doing it, and he certainly won’t admit to wanting to know if his deep, dark secrets are hanging out like underwear on a clothesline. In the front yard. In the middle of a busy city. (Hah!)

Well, he won’t tell you, but I will.

But first, two warnings:

First, this isn’t a complete list. Of course! But I think these are the two biggest ones. (I’m working on more articles about a few of the others…)

Second, I’m not telling you so you can shame him. I’m doing this so you can help him. But you have to be sneaky, so that he doesn’t know. Be nice to your man – he worships the ground you walk on, and believe me, he knows a few of your dirty dark secrets, too.

On to the juice, shall we?

GUY FEAR #1: My sexual desires are NOT okay

I won’t tell you that old thing about how guys want waaay more sex that women do, because it’s actually not true. Women want it, we just want it under different terms. He just… wants it. Every possible way he can imagine it. With your sister, your mom, the librarian (definitely the librarian), the teenager snapping her gum behind the cash register. He’s even had a dirty fantasy about that weird shopping cart lady.

Sex movies of every description (multiple lovers, bondage, fetish, you name it) run in his brain nearly all the time, and sometimes what’s showing on the screen shocks even him.

Deep down, he’s terrified that he wants sex too much, or in the wrong ways, with the wrong people. His sex drive is a formidable machine, and it’s a testament to his power that he doesn’t let it drive his life, only his brain.

What YOU can do to help him

Creating an atmosphere of openness in your intimate life with him is the first step in making him feel less scared about his sexual desire. I’m not saying you have to DO everything that he THINKS about, but be willing to ask him to talk about his fantasies. Invite him to give you steamy details. Even the act of sharing can be a tremendous gift of sexual energy between the two of you.

Help him learn to make YOU the star of his sexual mind shows, even if all you do is tell him a dirty story during foreplay.

And finally, don’t forget to let him know you’re sexually satisfied! If you can do this, he’s going to become so riveted by you he’ll never want to let you go. EVERY man wants to know he can sexually satisfy a woman.

GUY FEAR #2: Other men will think I’m weak

You gotta feel for the men of our world. They’re expected to get a respectable paycheck, make us feel secure, (not think about sex so much), beat out the other guys, support the winning team, be tough, overcome all the obstacles in their way, scare away the bad guys, and never show fatigue, fear, or ANYthing except sheer strength and confidence.

Two Things That Terrify All Men

It’s a lot to live up to.

It’s impossible to live up to, actually.

And yet that’s the challenge they hear every single day. And if they don’t answer it – actually DOMINATE it – their fear is that they will be publicly shamed, humiliated, despised… Not so much by you or by other women (although they hate the idea of that, too), but by other MEN.

But that doesn’t mean YOU don’t have power. Every man wants a woman who is unreservedly, whole-heartedly ON HIS SIDE. Your support actually adds to his power in the world of other men.

What YOU can do to help him

I have a question for you: if he’s fighting away on the field of his life, do you ever even show up at his game? And if you do, can he hear your enthusiastic, genuine support for him?

I’m not saying you have to actually get out your cheerleader skirt and shimmy and shout (although he’ll probably appreciate that, see #1 above!), but there IS a way to let him know you’re seeing how hard he works, and you want him to win.

Encourage him to tell you about his daily battles. Lean in and attentively soak up every bit. Ask for details. Don’t multitask while you’re doing this; give him your full focus. Be his raving fan.

And offer him your sincere admiration. Let him know how strong you find him, how amazing his accomplishments and abilities are. If you can make him feel like you believe in him and are on his side no matter what, you are going to ADDICT him to you.

3 Steps to Make a Man Love You

If you’re sick of “Bad Boys,” “Players” and guys who just won’t commit, you need to go watch this new video renowned relationship expert Michael Fiore put up. It’s called “3 Steps To Make A Man Love You” and it teaches you how to make a man not just “fall” for a you… But to actually make him obsessed with you so HE decides he WANTS to be serious…

–> Make him powerfully addicted (in a really good way) to you!

Michael lays out the absolute truth about what men really want and need from a woman for them to be able to give EVERYTHING to her… (In fact, he flat out tells you how his girlfriend Captured His Heart and made him fall for her HARD even though he was “playing the field” and thought he’d never settle down.)

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