4 Signs That a Long Distance Relationship Isnt Working

Sometimes you dont notice the signs at first. Something just feels off.

But eventually a clear, somber idea creeps into the back of your mind: My long distance relationship isnt working, is it?

Its no secret that long distance relationships are tough. Theyre not for everyone.

Wanting to hold on, some couples endure months, even years, of misery when they would have been much better off ending it.

What are some signs that a long distance relationship isnt working? How do you know if you should end your long distance relationship?

4 Signs That Its Time to End It

1. Youre not happy now -- Forget about the past for a minute. Push those giddy days of falling in love to the side and focus on the here and now. Are you happy? How often has the relationship provided joy in the past week or month? And how often has it brought you down?

Im not saying you should cut and run when times are tough. Couples hit rough patches. It happens.

What I am saying is that clinging to an unhappy present for the comfort of a once-happy past will probably lead you to a miserable future. 

2. Youre not invested in the relationships success -- Being far away from a partner is too much hassle for people who arent heavily invested in the partnerships success. You both need to want it work. 

One of the most damning signs that a long distance relationship isnt working is when one of you has emotionally abandoned it. You may continue to make phone calls and send emails, but if the fire behind why youre sending them is gone, or if your partner feels the same, you have a potentially serious problem. 

3. Your life plan changes -- Usually, couples who are apart have a finish line. They plan to be together in the future and theyre clear about when that will be, and where. Having a line in the sand can keep the relationship chugging forward even in the most demanding of times. 

You should consider ending the long distance relationship if it always seems impossible for you to ever close the distance. In other words, if neither of you will relocate, or if your plans for life shift dramatically, reconsider the merits of your relationship. Sure, youre getting emotional support now, but you could also be sabotaging yourself from meeting a partner who is better for you.

4. Your communication falters -- Communication is key. You cant talk past each other; you have to work together. And never-ending shouting matches can feel all the more painful when you dont have someone there in flesh and blood to interact with; frosty silences are perhaps even worse.

How to know if you should end a long distance relationship often boils down to this simple idea: No communication, no relationship. Period. 

The signs that a long distance relationship isnt working can creep up on you at first. You may feel something is off, but youre not fully sure how you can know that you should end your long distance relationship. You love your significant other, after all, and breakups hurt.

Avoiding the issues dont help, though. Slowly the signs will erode everything youve tried to build. By noticing them before they spiral out of control you can work to fix them or, if they cant be mended, you can walk away before too much damage happens.

Related Posts by Categories